Arsenal: HJP’s Mass Deception
by you wear me like a complexxx
Summary: Did you ever want to know what Harrys thoughts would be if he found out that he was constantly being lied to by everyone around him? Dark!Harry
1. Chapter 1: The Beginning

**Arsenal: H.J.P.'s Mass Deception**

Did you ever want to know what Harrys thoughts would be if he found out that he was constantly being lied to by everyone around him? Dark!Harry

Hey, Turkie here. Hope you like this, it is my first real story on All of the Lyrics are credited to the poem Three Women by Sylvia Plath and all the other stuff is credited to ME.

If you have any comments feel free to IM me on AIM at: turkietayles.

Would you also please not flame. I don't own Harry Potter and the other characters, after all I am a lowly highschool student, so please don't sue me.

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I will not go down under the ground

'Cause somebody tells me that death's comin' 'round

An' I will not carry myself down to die

When I go to my grave my head will be high.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

There's been rumors of war and wars that have been

The meaning of life has been lost in the wind

Ans some people thinkin' that the end is close by

'Stead of learnin' to live they are learning to die.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

I don't know if I'm smart but I think I can see

When someone is pullin' the wool over me

And if this war comes and death's all around

Let me die on this land 'fore I die underground.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

There's always been people that have cause to fear

They've been talking of the war mow for many long years

I have read all their statements and I've not said a word

But now Lawd God, let my poor voice be heard.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

If I had rubies and riches and crowns

I'd buy the whole world and change things around

I'd throw all the guns and the tanks in the sea

For they are mistakes of a past history.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

Let me drink form the waters where the mountain streams flood

Let the smell of wildflowers flow free through my blood

Let me sleep in your meadows with the green grassy leaves

Let me walk down the highway with my brother in peace.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

Go out in your country where the land meets the sun

See the craters and the canyons where the waterfalls run

Nevada, New Mexico, Arizona, Idaho

Let every state in this union seep down in your souls.

And you'll die in your footsteps

Before you go down under the ground.

–"LET ME DIE IN MY FOOTSTEPS"

by Bob Dylan

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Chapter 1: The Beginning

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Hey Journal,

I'm sort of new to the whole writing down my feelings thing. I guess that I should write down how you came to be in my possession and give you a name. Before all that though, I would just like to say that one of the major reasons that I started this diary was because a war is brewing and I would like to keep an account of all the things that will happen when I stop hiding and show everyone my true self. In showing who I now am everyone will see what the deaths of Sirius and Cedric have done to me, they will see what knowing my destiny has done to me. After all, Dumbledore basically said kill, or be killed.

_I am accused. I dream of massacres._

_I am a garden of black and red agonies. I drink them._

_Hating myself, hating and fearing. And now the world conceives_

_Its end and runs toward it, arms held out on love._

_It is a love of death the sickens everything._

_A dead sun stains the newsprint. It is red._

_I lose life after life. The dark earth drinks them._

Since they were threatened at Kings Crossing, the Dursleys have been almost bearable. They thought that it was only fare to get me a birthday present, so they brought you for me. Over this summer, I have learned many things including how to keep private diaries just that, private. The Dursleys were actually thoughtful for once, I like the diary a lot more that I would have liked a pensive, not that they would purchase some "freakish" wizard bowl.

_I am a mountain now, among mountainy people._

_The Dursleys move among us as if our bigness_

_Frightened the mind. They smile like fools._

_They are to blame for what I am, and they know it._

_They hug their flatness like a kind of health._

_And what if they found themselves surprised, as I did?_

_They would go mad with it._

This diary will help me clear my head and it will be harder to break into, Voldemort and Dumbledore will never know what hit them. So, I shall call you Arsenal and make it so that no one but I can read you. You will be my own personal cabinet of weapons, I will use your content to help me be free of Dumbledore, Voldemort, The Order of the Phoenix, and the Deatheaters.

_I am calm. I am calm. It is the calm before something awful:_

_The yellow minute before the wind walks, when the leaves_

_Turn up their heads, their pallors. It is do quiet here._

_The sheets, the faces, are white and stopped, like clocks._

_Voices stand back and flatten. Their visible hieroglyphs_

_Flatten to parchment screens to keep the wind off._

_They paint such secrets in Arabic, Chinese!_

I really must be going now though, we have to get to platform 9 and 3/4. Its horrible, Dumbledore is even making members of "The Order of the Phoenix" escort me to the train. I may have received you on my birthday, but I have only just now decided to use you. I felt that it was appropriate being as I have decided to turn over a new leaf.

_There is no miracle more cruel than this._

_I am dragged by the horses, the iron hooves._

_I last. I last it out. I accomplish a work._

_Dark tunnel, through which hurtle the visitations, _

_the visitations, the manifestations, the startled faces._

_I am the center of an atrocity._

_What pains, what sorrows must I be mothering?_

I will never again be Dumbledore's little "Golden Boy," Harry Potter. Being forced to stay at 12 Grimauld Place at the beginning of summer, before I was allowed to go to the Dursleys, has changed me, it has awoken the Slytherin in me.

_When I walk out, I am a great event._

_I do not have to think, or even rehearse. _

_What happens in me will happen without attention._

_The pheasant stands on the hill;_

_He is arranging his brown feathers._

_I cannot help smiling at what it is I know._

_Leaves and petals attend me. I am ready._

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Please RR, so I know whether or not I should continue the story.


	2. Chapter 2: Kings Crossing, Here I Come

**Arsenal: H.J.P.'s Mass Deception**

Did you ever want to know what Harrys thoughts would be if he found out that he was constantly being lied to by everyone around him? Dark!Harry

Hey, Turkie here. Hope you like this, it is my first real story on All of the Lyrics are credited to the poem Three Women by Sylvia Plath and all the other stuff is credited to ME.

If you have any comments feel free to IM me on AIM at: turkietayles.

Would you also please not flame. I don't own Harry Potter and the other characters, after all I am a lowly highschool student, so please don't sue me.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I will not go down under the ground

'Cause somebody tells me that death's comin' 'round

An' I will not carry myself down to die

When I go to my grave my head will be high.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

There's been rumors of war and wars that have been

The meaning of life has been lost in the wind

Ans some people thinkin' that the end is close by

'Stead of learnin' to live they are learning to die.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

I don't know if I'm smart but I think I can see

When someone is pullin' the wool over me

And if this war comes and death's all around

Let me die on this land 'fore I die underground.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

There's always been people that have cause to fear

They've been talking of the war mow for many long years

I have read all their statements and I've not said a word

But now Lawd God, let my poor voice be heard.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

If I had rubies and riches and crowns

I'd buy the whole world and change things around

I'd throw all the guns and the tanks in the sea

For they are mistakes of a past history.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

Let me drink form the waters where the mountain streams flood

Let the smell of wildflowers flow free through my blood

Let me sleep in your meadows with the green grassy leaves

Let me walk down the highway with my brother in peace.

Let me die in my footsteps

Before I go down under the ground.

Go out in your country where the land meets the sun

See the craters and the canyons where the waterfalls run

Nevada, New Mexico, Arizona, Idaho

Let every state in this union seep down in your souls.

And you'll die in your footsteps

Before you go down under the ground.

–"LET ME DIE IN MY FOOTSTEPS"

by Bob Dylan

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Chapter 2: Kings Crossing, Here I Come

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Hey Arsenal,

I am in a car on the way to Kings Crossing and I only have one thing to say: Damn Dumbledore and his stupid twinkling eyes, did he really think that I wouldn't find out? As it turns out, my meeting the Weasleys wasn't a mistake, he set it up. Him and his insipid little "Order."

_Can nothingness be so prodigal?_

_Here is Dumbledore._

_His wide eyes in that general, flat blue._

_He is turning to me like a little blind, bright plant._

_One look. It is the hook I hang on._

I am tired of the old man meddling in my life. He wanted to protect me, keep me from going dark, he had no idea that he was pushing me right into the place that he wanted to save me from, straight into the darkness. Of course I won't join Voldemort, after all that bastard killed my parents and tried to kill me, but I won't continue to be Dumbledore's little pawn either.

_How long can I be a wall, keeping the wind off?_

_How long can I be_

_Gentling the sun with the shade of my hand,_

_Intercepting the blue bolts of a cold moon?_

_The voices of loneliness, the voices of sorrow_

_Lap at my back ineluctably._

_How shall it soften them, this little lullaby?_

I have no one left, Padfoot was to be my salvation. How can one be saved when their salvation is withered and dead? How can one be saved if their savior is dead? I know that they've all seen it, the anger, its in me now. The pain, it controls me now. The other emotions, they're deadly now. I only have myself to blame for some things though.

_And so I stand, a little sightless._

_The body is resourceful._

_The body of a starfish can grow back its arms_

_and nets are prodigal in legs. And may I be_

_as prodigal in what lacks me._

That stupid hat wanted to put me in Slytherin, but no I just had to be put in Gryffindor with my fake friend Ron. I have come to hate my house. They have nothing but pity for me now. I guess that they thought that I would break when I lost Sirius, even if most considered him cold-blooded murderer. I would have never been pitied or babied if I had been placed in Slytherin, hell I doubt that Cedric and Sirius would have even died if I had been placed in Slytherin. Can you imagine the shock that would come with the fact that famous Harry Potter had been sorted into Slytherin. I might ask for a house change or to be resorted, just to spite everyone of course.

_I am myself again. There are no loose ends._

_I am bled white as was, I have no attachments._

_I am flat and virginal, which means nothing has happened,_

_Nothing that cannot be erased, ripped up and scrapped, begun again._

_There little black twigs do not think to bud,_

_Nor do these dry, dry gutters dream of rain._

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Please RR, so I know whether or not I should continue the story.


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